This post involves a review of a sex toy and as such probably contains more than you want to know about me if we are acquaintances. Read at your own risk…
You little perv, I like you…
The InJoyUs captivated me from the first time I heard about it. It was mentioned as an offhand recommendation from someone that I really respect. This person had not yet tried it, though that had little bearing on my decision. She knows the market, she knows her stuff, and I was willing to drop the money since it was tax return season.
Man, ever since I googled that name, it never left the open tabs on my phone. I looked it up constantly, like it might suddenly disappear on me. I found some pictures of girls wearing it that intrigued me. It kinda never left my mind for long.
I brought it up to my fiancé. He greenlit it, being a fan of pegging.
My current strap on situation was pretty meh. It was, you know, DOABLE. But it wasn’t as fun or as engaging as I’d like. I wanted more feedback, and I wanted something that felt more natural. I wanted something that didn’t choke my fatass thighs.
When I placed the order, I was exhilarated and then immediately disappointed that it hadn’t teleported. Foolishly, I had placed the order on a Friday night, lengthening my anxiety. But I got an e-mail at 9:16 at night on Sunday saying that a shipping label had been made. Now, I don’t know what kinda operation those InJoyUs folks are running, but they clearly need lives.
I got it very swiftly afterwards, my new dildo kit scurrying all the way across the country from Arizona. When my fiancé brought the nondescript box into the bedroom, I made a noise like a totally thrilled teakettle.
Ever so Dutch, I had elected The Party Pack which included the InJoyUs plus purple Lilly dildo attachment, jet black Lela dildo attachment, and a small bottle of Sliquid lubricant(which is good stuff), at a sale price of $199.99.
The InJoyUs itself just feels like quality. It’s got a nice texture, firm and pliable. It seems to be reinforced with some sort of composite or metal, but there’s still a little give.
The Lela is more flexible but definitely sturdy. It’s a really nice size, in my opinion. Some people might find it intimidating, but I think it’s got good balance. I find the balls confusing, but it IS fun to hold them and pretend it’s a gun. PEW!
The Lilly is basically useless to me, unless I happen to play with someone new to anal or something. I just think it’s too small and overly flexible. It’s a shame, because I’m a fan of the shape and color and I like that it extends the clitoral sensitizing region.
This was compared to getting the InJoyUs and the Caucasian toned Lela dildo attachment for $189.99.
Total no brainer, right?
I regret my decision.
If I had known then how significant that the InJoyUs would have been for my dysphoria, I would have chosen the Caucasian one 8 days a week.
I inserted what I’m gonna call the control bulb (‘cause I have psychological issues), according to the instructions. The first time. You are told the “pump” the g-spot with an increasing number of fingers, to help with accommodating the size and increasing natural lubrication. I loathe the concept of “pumping my g-spot.” I put it right up there with the action of churning butter and the idea of moistening a mink stole so you can swallow it better. I qualify this as a consumer interactions issue. Someone didn’t consult a focus group.
The second time? I was just already raring to go. A little lube on the toy and there was no concern.
I believe it was this difference that accounted for a quality of experience change.
I won’t lie, the first time I had the InJoyUs in and masturbated, manipulating the cock to stimulate my g-spot and a vibe on the clitoral zone, I had the best orgasm of my life. I think it was a crucial moment for my headspace as well, as I was just starting to come out as FTM transgender.
I followed that experience up with having a bangin’ good time pegging my boy. It was an eye opening connectedness with the fucking that I had never experienced with a strap on. Granted, it’s a little backwards since pulling out is what gives you the g-spot pleasure. But to have no straps, no harness, no little pinchy bits, you can focus on what you’re doing. You can look into your partner’s eyes. And, perhaps most crucially, you can watch them grin wildly at how much spasmodical pleasure YOU are getting out of the experience.
The issue I encountered though, before sex while it was inserted, was that if I coughed, laughed, or bent down, it felt incredibly tense at the opening on my vagina. That gradual flare area was where it was clamping down, it caused some serious discomfort. I don’t believe that it was inserted improperly(trust me, I examined the diagrams), I think that it had more to do with the concept of vaginal tenting. Since I had used their pumping method and had not already been aroused, I think that the vaginal canal was not prepared for a toy of that size. It didn’t prove to be a problem during the second usage.
Going back to the psychological aspect, yes, I absolutely regret my decision to get the party pack instead of just the dildo kit. But there was a little more that happened on the second go that is by no means the fault of the toy, I just want to get it out of my head. I…we… were having a grand old time. But I got hit by a sudden feeling of inadequacy and a really severe bout of dysphoria. I had to stop. I curled up in an anxious heap of blankets. It’s concerning to me because I really hope that the toy has not become a psychological trigger, because that would be a hell of a way to waste two hundred bucks and it’s hard to explain to a therapist.
I would absolutely recommend this toy. I’d suggest shooting it out of t-shirt cannons at events if I didn’t think it’d cause concussions.